Good news. I have finally found my ego.
After years of knowing it was in there somewhere, I realized last week that it is, in fact, in my left lower back.
And she is a feisty motherfucker.
She shouts to me loudly, "go deeper in that pose, Amy!"
"You're a yoga teacher so you should do that handstand, that forearm balance, that twisted half moon!"
And then she laughs her evil laugh when my SI joint whimpers. That spot on my lower back that I exploit, where I dump weight that the rest my body can't support or isn't open enough to take on. That dark little place I use to prove myself in the yoga room.
Maybe for you, it's your shoulder. Or your hip. Either way, you know it when you feel it. It probably sounds something like "I shouldn't do this but..."
I need to show them I can. Maybe it won't hurt as much this time. Just to prove I've still got it.
That ego lair is a scary place when you first look in there. But once you're aware, once you shine light on it...
All of a sudden you are back in control. And everything becomes a little more clear.