Aparigraha

My experiences this week have all danced around one main principle... holding on. Holding on too tightly. There is a yogic term called aparigraha, or non-possesiveness. It's one of the yamas, which, along with the niyamas, make up the yogi code of conduct. The idea is that when we grasp too tightly to something, we never end up getting what we want. We see it most easily in relationships... We all know the story of the chick who gave up searching and let go and all of a sudden, boom - she meets the man of her dreams, right? When you are so desperately looking for a man, they never show up. When you spend your time controlling external circumstances, trying to hold on so strongly to something, it doesn't work in your favor.

Life is an ebb and a flow, a yin and a yang. When you are always yang, always pushing, always in the masculine energy, you don't have the softness and openness to let experiences flow in. Personally, I love control, it's very comfortable for me. And because of that, my default operating mode is in the yang. But living in the yang never really goes in my favor. When I can soften, be vulnerable, be in my feminine, let things in - when I am in the yin - life is a lot more beautiful. All of this is a dance and a delicate balance and like real dancing, it takes practice, work, rhythm and awareness. 

wedding dance
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